Heya, I’m Winter from Life or Something Like (B)it! Chelle asked me to drop by and bring you the next installment of the Girly Girl Series because I am a self confessed Purse Ho. I’ve always had a thing for a well made purse. Who doesn’t like the smell of quality leather anyway? However, in the past few years, I’ve upped my game from the likes of Rolf’s to designer names.

I live in Orange County, California where we are overrun with pretentious, stay at home moms with perfectly dyed and coifed hair, long fake French manicure nails, who yap on their Razrs while driving carelessly in their Hummers. C’mon, what woman wearing Seven jeans and taking the Yorkie to the vet, NEEDS to drive a Hummer? At any rate, these women are usually seen with designer purses slung from their elbows. I may be disdainful of their pretentiousness, but when it comes to arm candy, I’ve been studying them. What I see on their elbows, falls into 4 distinct categories.

The first category of purse carrier is the Walmart Woman. This woman doesn’t care what she carries as long as it holds all her shit. She doesn’t keep her purse tidy and carries lots of extraneous crap. These women grab whatever $12.99 Walmart bag that looks big enough for their stuff. They don’t care if the purse disintegrates in six months.

The second category of purse carrier is the Best of Everything Woman. This woman has to carry whatever is the considered the zenith in purses. She’s the woman who subscribes to Vogue just for the purse ads and would carry a Judith Leiber clutch to the market if it would hold all her credit cards. She buys Fendi, Hermes, Bottega Veneta, and Prada. The Fendi B. Bag (pictured above), at about $28K, is the most expensive purse there is, according to Forbes, followed by the Hermes Birkin. This woman probably has both.

The third category of purse carrier is the Trendy But Funky At All Costs Woman. These are the women who carry Juicy Couture, L.A.M.B, Kate Spade, and Betsy Johnson. This woman wants to carry something unusual, trendy, and funky. They want to carry what Gwen Stefani carries. They want to BE Gwen Stefani. (I don’t blame them. Her DH is hawt!)

The last category of purse carrier is the Pricey But Worth It Woman. This is the woman who carries Dooney and Bourke, Louis Vuitton, and Coach. These, to me, are the Big Three. These are the purses you will find the most of on eBay. They’re the ones you see on the elbows of women from every walk of life. And probably half of the purses you see on those elbows… are fakes. Because of their popularity, they are the most copied purses in the world.

I’m not a Coach girl, but a lot of my coworkers are. I’ve heard them talk about Coach’s quality. I’ve heard them espouse the classic lines and designs that make owning a Coach worthwhile. And I really have seen them carry the same purses around for years. The timeless styling is a hallmark of Coach. Their all leather purses (as opposed to the ones with the trademark Coach embossed canvas) are the cheaper alternative to a Bottega Veneta.

Louis Vuitton is the most expensive of the Big Three, and the most copied. It’s hard to find a real Louis on eBay even though most are “guaranteed authentic.” I have some fake LVs. All of them came with real LV dust bags. Here’s the pics of ours:

The brown one is the classic Monogram Speedy 30. The white one is a Murakami. The little one is a mini Speedy, and the coin purse is a Monogram Cherries. I also have a Monogram Denim Neo Speedy, but it is buried in the depths of my teen’s bedroom so I am posting a pic from eLuxury below. Trust me on this, mine is identical in every way.

Even the fakes are expensive when you talk LV. I’ve got the best fake denim speedy out there. I matched it up against one purchased at eLuxury for $1900. Identical. The woman who owned the original freaked. My Cherries coin purse is authentic though.

When it comes to Dooney and Bourke, I am a slut. I own lots of Dooneys from the classic All Weather Leather to It, to Stars, to the new Giraffe. Mine are all authentic. You can check the serial numbers with Dooney to ensure that what you’ve bought is real. Here’s my collection.

On the left are the AWL purses, which all have the signature hanging brass duck tag. My black It collection (in the center of the photo) includes the camera bag, the north south bucket, a wristlet, and a cell phone case. The north south tartan bucket on the right belongs to my daughter. Then there is the Stars bucket and wristlet. And finally, my brand new, straight from Dooney Online, Giraffe bucket. I also have another Dooney keyring and a Dooney bracelet.

Dooney has a number of things that are distinctive about them. Brand new, they come with numbered, barcoded, registration cards and blue dust bags. They have serial number tags inside. The purses usually have cell phone pockets and key ring leashes.

If you’re going to buy a purse off of eBay, or from any place that is not an authentic seller of those purses (like Saks or the designer’s online store), make sure you read all the articles out there about fakes. Make sure you use PayPal and that you’re buying from a seller that has lots of good feedback and uses the correct terminology in their ad (guaranteed authentic, registration card enclosed, etc.)

Above is a pic of a giraffe purse I bid on at eBay. See the red interior? I didn’t know what color the interior of the giraffe purse was. I thought this was real. Well, the price got too close to Dooney’s so I dropped out of the bidding. Which was a good thing, because when I bought a real one from Dooney, I discovered the interior was pink (see below). Not red. So it pays to do your homework when buying from somewhere other than a genuine vendor.

If you like purses, check out Arm Candy Girl. Read the articles on eBay before buying there. Email me with questions. Then go forth and buy something you like! Sure, these bags are a little pricey, but they last. They are well made from quality materials.

My giraffe cost $175. I will probably get the matching wallet eventually. Anyone can afford these, even my kid. Save $25 a paycheck for a couple of months, and you’ll have something stylish that lasts, looks and is expensive, and will give you confidence that what you are carrying proclaims to the world that you are a woman who is worth every penny… and more.