Yea! 20Q Wednesday is back! Today, Metalmom has been gracious enough to share a few things about herself. I am so excited! Chelle always has major problems with formatting. Sorry about that. Wordpress has sucky formatting options.

Don’t forget that my responses are italicized below her answers.

_____________________AND HERE WE GO!_____________________

 

11. . 1. Name your top five 80’s bands.

In no particular order: Black Flag, Black Sabbath, Dokken, AC/DC, Van Halen

22. 2. Please select that which you partook in the 80’s from the following listed items:

I was pregnant though 1980 and 1985. then I was in Hub’s jeans and oversized flannel shirts. Otherwise I wore:

a. leg warmers

b. half shirts

c. leather mini-skirts

d. Jellies

e. Units

f. Rave III hairspray

g. Big-ass bangs

h. Crimping

i. Madonna look

j. black eyeliner

k. perm

l. break-dancing

m. Mad Dog 20/20

n. trash can punch

o. LSD, or any other hallucinogenic

p. Too much Bud light

q. Spring break at the beach, drunk out of your mind and fucking like rabbits

r. Stretch pants

s. Slouch socks. and torn acid washed jeans,and “CosbyShow” sweaters

(Chelle wore most of the above.)

3. 3. 3. Have you ever been in a mosh pit? Tell us about it.

Unfortunately, no. If I could I would do it in a heartbeat. Sad to say, having a bad back makes this one just a
dream…..*sigh*

(Chelle would kill everyone if she were in a mosh-pit. It would take ten people to move her through the crowd.)

4. What is your favorite cuss word, and why?

Fuck, of course. It is the only word I can think of in the entire English language that is so versatile. I use it for EVERYTHING.

 

5. How do you handle housework with 3 kids? I hate doing floors. I will do everything, but will hire
maids just to do my floors. Do you have any advice?

For me? MY kids are older. Housework isn’t too bad. I have other people’s kids during the day. I deal with housework by doing it after 5pm. I tend to clean when I get angry. When I get really pissed off, I will scrub with a toothbrush! I get angry ALOT so my house isn’t usually too dirty. My advice is, the dishes will be there tomorrow. Get out today and do what you want.

(Chelle will not do housework. She is anal about it, but floors and the bathtub are too much for her.)

6. You like to do puzzles. What are your favorite types of puzzles? Do you hang them on your wall? What
is the funniest puzzle you have done?

I love word games and word puzzles. As far as jigsaw puzzles, I like the ones that are 3-D. No. I don’t save them. I have
done one in the shape of a butterfly. It had repeating patterns on each side of the wings. I have also done one with 88
Japanese tigers and no picture to guide me.

(Chelle’s mother is a psycho. She hangs her puzzles, even though her house is decorated from the most expensive
place in town.)

7. What is your most embarrassing moment from the 80’s?

That would be when I shit on Son1 while giving birth. He paid me back when he was 4 by screaming as we walked to my mother’s house. He screamed “Let go of me!!! You’re not my mommy!!” An old man came running out of the house to save him.

(Chelle has nothing on this one. That’s hilarious!)

8. If money were no object, and you had no barriers, what would you do with your life, where would you live, etc?

I would live where I am now. I complain about it sometimes but it is beautiful, safe and quiet. I’d like to travel and see Japan. I probably would go to school and do something….What? I have no fucking idea!

(Chelle would hire hitmen to kill a bunch of people.)

9. Which is more pleasurable for you in terms of orgasms? Masturbation or the real thing?

When he pays attention, Hubs is pretty fucking awesome. Other times a girl just has to do what a girl has to do..If I’m in a hurry, it’s me all the way!

(Yup, Chelle agrees.)

10. What have you done with Mr. Fab’s penis? Anything raunchy or funny?

I have it ready to send to Kyra. I have to admit, I am a procrastinator so I took my time with it. I cannot divulge what I have done with it….(See the answer to #9)

(Girl, when is Chelle going to get it!?)

11. You said that nail polish must be “a certain kind”. What does that mean?

I like to do my own nails. When I say certain kind I mean: Must go on smoothly. Must not chip or peel easily. Must dry quickly. Must come off cleanly with polish remover (I hate when they stain the nail.) Colorwise-Black or Really Red.

(Chelle recommends an ultraviolet light, any kind, and a top coat that is meant for ultra-violet light. Best way to keep your nail polish on. And use OPI.)

12. When you look at women (in order to make fun of them), what is the first body part you look at?

Ass. A woman shouldn’t shove a fat ass into tights or straight-leg jeans. If I can see the dimples of your cellulite, they are TOO TIGHT! After that it is makeup. As women get older, blue just doesn’t work anymore!!

(Here here! Chelle has a saying; “Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.”)

13. Why Southern Comfort?

Why not? Actually I fell in love with it in high school and I never grew up. I like that I can put into coke, peach tea, fruit punch or straight up. Just don’t water it down or try to pass off a drink made with 75 proof. I know right away. I only do the 100 proof.

(Chelle didn’t know that SC comes in 100 proof. She wonders if Vodka comes in 100 proof.)

14. Have you ever found yourself looking at your kids’ teenage friends and realize that, “OMG, these kids
are illegal?” I have done this. But it was my friend’s kids.

Both of my sons are over 21 so IT’S ON!! When he turned 18, one of Son1’s friends said I was the MILF of his dreams growing up and did I want to make it come true. EWW!! I was his den mother for fuck’s sake!!! Personally, I like a MAN! Thirty to sixty is okay with me.

(Chelle wants to be an Aunt-ILF. Sort of. Her niece is only 12.)

15. Since you want to be a bounty hunter as your ultimate career, would be your favorite gun to carry?

357 Magnum. Power,baby!

(Wow, you don’t fuck around!)

16. What three male bloggers would you do?

• Trukindog (have you seen him?)

  

• Avitable (have you seen his balls?)

  

• MattMan (Have you seen his sweet ‘Half Naked Thursday’s?)

  

• And Fab I can’t leave him out. He makes me laugh the most so that makes him the hottest.

  

(Chelle hasn’t seen Trukindog, but she is going to look at him first thing this morning and visit her vibrator.)

17. What is your favorite thing about your car? If you could have any car in the whole world, what would it be?

I don’t drive so there is no favorite thing about my car. If I could have any car? A 1968 Chevelle- royal blue with a
white racing stripe. SWEET!

(Whenever Chelle hears “Chevelle”, for some reason she thinks Chevette. Not sure why.)

18. You tend to like trailer park names. Where did this affinity come from, since you live in Philly?

I just like to ‘play’ redneck. It’s too easy to fall into the drawl and attitude.

(Chelle feels sorry for MM’s kids. Especially on the playground.)

19. What do you like/love the most about hubs?

He tolerates my shit. I can be the biggest bitch in the world and he will laugh at me, tell me to chill and then come back to talk. Any other guy would be sorely tempted to punch me in the mouth (and risk castration).

(Chelle wonders if there is a man out there that would put up with her shit. Oh and being fat.)

20. What is one topic you would like to see my cover in the Girly-Girl series?

How to cover bulges without wearing a tent or moo-moo. And without spending tons ‘o cash!)

(Chelle will consult Vogue and Cosmo. They always have that kind of shit, and do it on how to dress in less expensive
stuff, but she saw Carmen Diaz wearing a moo-moo on the Daily Ten last night. Apparently they are in. God the new
fashions SUCK BALLS right now. She even saw someone wear a Mexican dress as the new thing.)