20Q Wednesday, brought to you by Folgers and Provigil (as usual), is please to announce that today’s honoree guinea pig victim is none other than the fabulous Mr. Fab! BTW, Fab’s birthday is in four days!

Housekeeping:

I am sorry that I haven’t been commenting on your posts. I have been doing a lot of writing lately. I will be catching up today.

Please don’t forget to go and sign up for the Absurdist Video Contest!

And now, onto the questions!

Tell me about your fascination of other women’s boobs instead of just Mrs. Fab’s.

I am a boob man. I make no apologies for that. I love the boobs. Everyone loves boobs, men and women alike. In that respect, I am no different.

(Chelle has enough boobs to keep her from worrying about everyone else’s.)

You’re a major flirt (okay, that’s an understatement). Are you full of shit, or do you really want a five-way with Mrs. Fab?

I guess I am a flirt, but I am a secondary flirt. I never flirt first. I don’t have that kind of confidence. Women flirt with me first. However, as I have stated before, for the most part they do it because they know I am married and 1000 miles away. If I was single and lived in their town I am the last person they would flirt with, for fear I would show up on their doorstep.

(Chelle would do fab if he were next door and not married.)

What do you think is your best physical characteristic? Please send me a photo. I sent you a picture of my boobs, full. Tit for Tat.

I have no idea what my best physical characteristic is. I have nice eyes, I guess. I have big hands. Perhaps I should send you some nude photos of me and let you decide?

(Chelle is still waiting for a naked picture of Fab. Pussy.)

Name your top five readers that you really want to have a three-way with, and why.

You-squirting. Robin-boobs. Kyra-anal sex. Hilly-I want to find out if she screams “Oh My God!” when she orgasms. Turnbaby–A woman like that probably KNOWS things.

(Chelle won’t touch the others cuz sex with women grosses her out, but wonders if she would even have room to have sex with fab with all those other women around at one time.)

What is your most favorite post that you have written on Pointless Drivel? Please share the link and tell us why it’s your favorite.

Probably my favorite was either the post I wrote denouncing the firing of Don Imus, because he has always been a huge influence on me or the post I wrote detailing my firing from my corporate job for having a blog that I made a fairy tale out of.

If you could have sex with any man in the whole world, who would it be? Why?

Clive Owen, because he is just…perfect.

Without cheating, what was the color of my bra in the second booby picture?

I can’t remember. I have a very poor memory.

(Geez. And it was a great picture. All the other guys I sent it to remember.)

If you went to Amsterdam, which drugs would you do? Why?

Nothing I had to smoke, or shoot up or put up my nose. If they have some drugs I can take orally, I would be up for that. The day I find a doctor who will prescribe for me whatever narcotics I want, I am in BIG trouble.

(Chelle would smoke pot.)

What does your “fun zone” (the area is that dedicated to Fab, and not Mrs. Fab) look like?

Well…technically the den is my fun-zone. It was the only room I was allowed to decorate, and it was where I used to spend most of my time playing video games and MMORPGS. But since I started blogging and got a laptop, my fun-zone is pretty much wherever I want it to be. My fun-zone IS my laptop and the whole damn internet!

(Fun-zone is an area of the house you dedicate to your dorky husband to decorate like he wants. It’s the room you never go into for fear of throwing up.)

Why have you never created a black person, Mexican, Muslim, etc. sculpey? Are you a racist?

You have not done your homework. For shame! I have done Ghandi, and the Dali Lama, and I have done a Mexican gardener that hung out with Jesus. I have done African natives. Ha! In your face!

(Chelle needs to go peruse the Sculpy category. She apparently is wrong. Yeah, I said it, Wayne)

Do you have any friends that you can introduce to me for me to date? What are they like?

I have some imaginary friends that are AWESOME in the sack, if you’re up for that.

(Chelle wonders what an imaginary dick would feel like. Kinda disappointing, chelle would imagine.)

If you were to fill out the Eharmony questionnaire, would you be rejected? If yes, why? If you would be accepted, what type of people do you think you would be hooked up with?

I don’t know what the Eharmony questionnaire is like. Does it have any questions about fisting and Dirty Sanchezes, because that would help a lot if it did.

(Chelle was exclusively set up with Chefs and Truck Drivers. Go figure.)

What is the best literotica you have written? Link to it?

The best sex scene I have ever written is actually in my book, so I can’t link to it. In it, the protagonist has a dream in which he sodomizes Daffy Duck. Mrs. Fab wanted me to take it out, but I refused.

(Chelle writes literotica too, but you just try to get that damned link out of me. Fab has read it though.)

What is your favorite kind of sex toy? Why?

I like to have a toilet brush shoved up my ass, handle first. It’s sexy, and functional. After sodomiztion, I can clean the toilet with it.

(Chelle wonders how he gets the shit off the handle-end before cleaning the shit in the toilet.)

If you were going to start a religion, what kind of religion would it be, and what would be the rules/dogma?

I’d like to start a religion that would worship Wally Cox like a God. Does anyone know who Wally Cox was? Probably not. I guess it will be a lonely religion.

Do you believe in aliens from other worlds? If yes, what was your abduction like?

I do a post on this kinda this week [last week]. I think most aliens are like the Swiss. Polite, they make good chocolate, and don’t want to get involved. Oh, and the yodeling.

Of all of your alters (personalities that control your body), which is the most dangerous, and why?

In times of great stress I become a 19th century haberdasher. It’s dangerous to others because I am very good at it, and I will sell you many more hats than you can comfortably afford.

(Chelle wonders what kind of hat both Fab and Avi can hang off their dicks.)

Have you ever worn women’s clothing? Tell us the story.

I like to wear petticoats when it’s cold out, but I think most men do, don’t they? Also, I like to wear support hose when I go on job interviews.

(Chelle wonders if Fab knows the difference between a petticoat and a girdle.)

What were you like as a teen and in your early 20’s?

I am the same guy I am now, except I was drunk ALL THE TIME. Oh, and I used to get into a lot of auto accidents.

(Chelle wonders how many DUIs Fab has, and if she beats him out.)

Please create a quick video professing your love for me and share the youtube link. You bitch.

A video? No one else had to do a fucking video. Good thing I love you!

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