This is my attempt at a Sunday overview of the week. I can’t guarantee that I will do this every week, as I am terrible at follow-through, unless it is work related. I mean, I can’t even follow all the way through baking a cake. I just stop at the batter and eat it.
So, without further ado, here is the Weekend Wrap-Up.
This weekend was so lame. Poppy gave me her fucking cold. She snuck over here like a lesbian in heat, crawled into my bed, licked my face, and got away unnoticed. Bitch. So, I ran out and got an armament of cold medicine and food and camped out at home.
Saturday sucked. I just layed around like a lump with nothing better to do than watch High School Musical on Disney Channel. Man, that’s an all new low; let me tell you. I felt like a born-again virgin with a roofie stuck in my throat. I have no idea what that means, so don’t ask. I am in a drug-induced cold coma, so I have an out.
Sunday, I slept most of the day. However, I couldn’t stand how badly the boys were smelling, so I decided to torture them with water and soap. After sitting in the bath of lukewarm water, scrubbing them with gay-ass smelling doggie shampoo, drying them off, cleaning up the revenge pee-pee on the floor, I was left with this:
I recognize that Nick looks stoned, but I assure you that he is just stupid.
So, after all of that, I was so gross that I had to take a shower. And this is what I was left with:
And NO, this is not me. My ankles are much thinner.
Now, my cold has moved into my intestines. What’s better? Upper respiratory or intestinal? Who knows.
So, the rest of the evening is mine. Maybe The Princess Diaries will come on and make the rest of my weekend. Well, I’m off to bake a cake…
6 responses so far ↓
1 Poppy // Sep 30, 2007 at 8:21 pm
A lesbian in heat? What the hell is the point of being in heat if I’m a lesbian?? (It’s still really funny.)
That cold you have? That is TOTALLY what I had. It’s still lingering. I’m still blowing my nose every 3 seconds and when I try to sleep I cough all night.
And I think that is you but you’re retaining water so your ankles just got a little bigger.
2 chelle // Sep 30, 2007 at 8:24 pm
That’s not me. My house is *MUCH* nicer.
Although, those do look like my boobs… I would give you a list of men you could double-check with, but I don’t think that they would like their anonymity broken. And you, you who are reading this, you know who you are.
All joking aside (yeah, right), I do hope you feel better soon. This Zicam seems to be working… The cold isn’t half as bad as it could be…
3 Poppy // Sep 30, 2007 at 8:28 pm
Next time I’m totally taking Zicam, just because you said so.
My boobs would look like that if they were that big.
What’s up with all the ex-boy stalkers?
4 Wayne // Oct 1, 2007 at 7:03 am
I don’t believe it’s possible for Poppy to crawl into bed with someone, lick their face and get away unnoticed.
5 Poppy // Oct 1, 2007 at 7:16 am
Thank you for defending my honor!
6 chelle // Oct 1, 2007 at 7:37 am
Oh, no boy-stalkers… Just wishful thinking…
Are you saying that Poppy can’t be as stealthful as a cat? I would think that is more of an insult than a compliment.
Come on man. You know you want to say something!